그 사람이 보고 싶어서 미칠 지경이예요

I miss him so much that I’m about to go mad.

And no! This is not another heartbroken rant.

It’s a sample sentence from TOPIK Essential Grammar 150 Intermediate for the -을 지경이다 sentence pattern.

1111111111111

헐!

Nice! Really nice!

This. And other similar sample sentences about love, dating and breaking-up on various Korean books makes me hate studying Korean these days! LOL!

Just when one is already struggling to make a “comeback” on studying Korean, I’d have to be greeted by this!!!

눈치가 없다! >.<

Good thing I was in quite a good mood today when I came across that sentence so I just laughed and took a photo of it. :)

Okay, I must admit I don’t think I’ll be able to forget the -을 지경이다 pattern because of this example. So, thanks!

 

Learning Korean These Days Are A Tad More Difficult

This post has been sitting on my draft folder for months now but I never got the time energy will to finish it until I’ve watched this scene from I Need Romance Season 2 (episode 6).

Youtube Link

만진다. 잡는다. 간다. 온다. 가르친다. 외출한다. 본다. 느낀다. 슬퍼한다. 화난다. 춤춘다. 노래한다. 밉다. 운다. 웃는다. 사랑한다. 사랑한다. 많이 많이 사랑한다. 상처입는다. 상처입힌다. 키스한다. 그리고 잔다. 이 수많은 말들 중에 나하고 상관없는거 있어? 하나라도 있음 말해봐.

“만진다. 잡는다. 간다. 온다. 가르친다. 외출한다. 본다. 느낀다.
슬퍼한다. 화난다. 춤춘다. 노래한다. 밉다. 운다. 웃는다.
사랑한다. 사랑한다. 많이 많이 사랑한다.
상처입는다. 상처입힌다. 키스한다. 그리고 잔다.
이 수많은 말들 중에 나하고 상관없는거 있어? 하나라도 있음 말해봐.”

“I touch (you). I hold (you). I go. I come. I teach (you). I go out. I see (you). I feel (you).
I get sad. I get angry. I dance. I sing. I hate (you). I cry. I laugh.
I love (you). I love (you). I love you very very much.

I get hurt. I hurt (you). I kiss (you). And I sleep (with you).
Out of these numerous words, is there one that you don’t associate with me?
If there’s even one, let me know.”

It’s been about 7 years that I’ve been learning Korean and in all those seven years I haven’t stopped learning the language. I may not always have a grammar book in tow in all of those 7 years but I make it a point I have something Korean with me each day – be it a novel, a children’s book, a song, a drama, a movie, a subtitling project, an old TOPIK paper, an old notebook, talking with Korean friends, writing a diary, etc. I’ve never stopped. Until a few months ago.

Actually it’s been on and off for the past year. But I’ve completely shut everything out a couple of months ago. Unintentionally perhaps, since I didn’t plan to do so anyway.

Learning Korean has suddenly become a difficult thing for me.

Because of him. Because of me and my stupid heart.

Although I’m generally a visual learner, I’ll probably categorize myself as an “emotional” learner, if there’s such a thing, when it comes to learning Korean. Maybe because Korean dramas were my foundation, I associate words (and even grammar patterns) with emotions. With feelings and memories. And sometimes with people too. For example, when learning a new word, I can remember that Kim Sun Ah has used it in this drama in this episode and in this specific scene. I would remember the mood of the scene, the background music if any and what her character is feeling at that time and how exactly she uttered the word. And the word, along with all the feelings I’ve associated with it, would be planted in my memory. Not only for Kim Sun Ah. It works for me on other dramas, on movies on webtoons, on songs and on my personal experiences too. And it was fun. It used to be fun. But not anymore.

“만진다. 잡는다. 간다. 온다. 가르친다. 외출한다. 본다. 느낀다.
슬퍼한다. 화난다. 춤춘다. 노래한다. 밉다. 운다. 웃는다.
사랑한다. 사랑한다. 많이 많이 사랑한다.
상처입는다. 상처입힌다. 키스한다. 그리고 잔다.
이 수많은 말들 중에 나하고 상관없는거 있어? 하나라도 있음 말해봐.”

“…Out of these numerous words, is there one that you don’t associate with me? If there’s even one, let me know.”

하나라도 없어. Not even one.

I’ve tried. I’ve tried numerous times. I would try to clear my mind and go over a page from a book. One sentence. Two sentences. Three. And then a word would catch my attention. It may be a word he taught me. Or a word I learned from him. A word I’ve told him. A word he told me. A word I’ve used when we’re together. A word he used. A word he wrote. A word I’ve heard from him. A word he looked up in the dictionary for me. A word I’ve looked up in the dictionary for him. Or simply something that we did together. Or a word I could’ve told him. A word I wasn’t able to tell him. A word I wish he told me. A word I wish I’d have told him. A word I wish he never told me. A word I wish I never said. Anything. Everything.

And the memories and old feelings I’m trying to forget will all go back. I’d end up spending the rest of the day staring into blank space, thinking over-thinking,  wasting time, wasting tears and then criticizing and hating myself for still being affected that way.

So I avoided it. I avoided it thinking it won’t do me any good if I continuously push myself into my books. I avoided it just like how I avoided everything else in my life right now. I’ve become a coward. I’ve become so afraid of the pain I’ll do anything to avoid it. And I know it’s not the right thing to do.

It’s just sad that the thing (learning Korean) that used to comfort me when I’m sad or lonely or stressed or my head’s in a total mess has become something that now antagonizes me.

But no, I’m not giving it up. Never will! I’ve been learning Korean for 6 years before I met him. Who is he to mess it all up? I’m just saying it has become difficult.

I’ve started watching Korean dramas again a week ago even if it’s killing me. I found a will to write again (even if I’m not exactly happy of how this post has become!). And I’m planning quite excited to re-open my TOPIK Essentail Grammar 150 Intermediate in a bit since TOPIK is only 16 days away.

Today seems a good day. I may end up crying myself to sleep again tonight but I’ve been missing my Korean books so I’m gonna give it a try today.

“만진다. 잡는다. 간다. 온다. 가르친다. 외출한다. 본다. 느낀다.
슬퍼한다. 화난다. 춤춘다. 노래한다. 밉다. 운다. 웃는다.
사랑한다. 사랑한다. 많이 많이 사랑한다.
상처입는다. 상처입힌다. 키스한다. 그리고 잔다…”

oPGKIUySNs1D635084727204128357

I Hate Rest Days!

Today’s one of the few days I get to spend home. For the past weeks/months I’m always outside with friends (or sometimes by myself) during my rest days.

I used to look forward to my rest days. Nothing’s better than having to spend a day or two in my jammies doing absolutely nothing. Or movie/drama marathoning, studying Korean, reading books, staying in bed all day and all night long.

But this time it’s different.

I hate rest days! Like today!

I’ve become very used to having fun with friends all around me. From fooling around to talking heart to heart. I used to be a loner and I enjoy the solitude of spending time alone. But being with my friends helps me forget things I should have forgotten a long time ago. And now that I’m by myself once more… as much as I hate to admit it… I can’t help but have these senseless useless and stupid thoughts sprawling all around my head and my heart just keeps getting heavier and heavier.

Thoughts. Worries. Loneliness. Pain. Regrets. Anger. I’m sick and tired of all of them. But I just can’t push them all away. I’ve read somewhere one should go through IT and not go around it. The thing is, I’ve been going around IT over and over and over… So I’m stuck in this endless circle.

I kn0w I can’t be with my friends all the time. I also know I can’t always be outside our house all the time. I need to rest too especially now that I’m not getting any younger. Going out non-stop tires me easily – and cost money!

I’ll just find myself some good movies or try to study some Korean and sleep the whole day. Thing on my To Do List? I’ll just deal with them when I feel like it… :(

[Apply Now] The 36th Book Review Lucky Draw Begins.

alodia:

Yey! Another Fairy Tale book! Trying my luck once more. Fellow Korean learners and bloggers, Join now if you haven’t! :)

Originally posted on twoChois:

안녕하세요-

포스팅이 너무 늦어져 죄송합니다. (–)(__)

다음주엔 늦지 않도록 올릴게요!

이번 주는,

오랜만에 예림아이 전래동화 입니다.

이번엔 “빨강 부채, 파랑 부채” 라는 제목의 이야기에요.

The book is suitable for upper intermediate to advanced level learners.

All written in Korean and it contains audio CD.

Book Info.

9___51027.1382675098.1280.1280.gif.html

빨강 부채 파랑 부채 (Red Fan Blue Fan)

ISBN: 9788965671831  /  30 pages  / Size : 190 x 220 mm

This book is from “Little Classic Book” Series published by 예림아이.

This series contains 20 Korean fairytale(전래동화) stories and each book has audio CD in it.

However, books are all written in Korean and originally written for Korean children(age 4~7).

Suitable for upper intermediate to advanced learners.

Great and affordable series as reading material. :)

** Preview images of the book. (Click the image to see bigger size)

9_1__28827.1382675098.1280.1280.gif.html

9_2__44873.1382675098.1280.1280.gif.html

9_3__84991.1382675098.1280.1280.gif.html

Check out more preview images on our store. :)
- if you cannot see bigger preview…

View original 184 more words

32nd TOPIK Result and Experience

This is such a late post, but I’d still want to share my experience during the 32nd TOPIK last October 20, 2013.

As expected I wasn’t able to finish all my planned preparations for the exam so I was trying to cram whatever I can, especially for the writing part, on my way to the testing center.

I think I was able to prepare pretty okay for the listening part since it’s easy to just put on my earphones anytime anywhere and listen to previous listening exams. I wanted to prepare for the reading part more but I only managed to go through a couple of papers. I know I need to work hard on the writing part, but I ended up not practicing for it at all.

On my way to KCC I wondered what could be the question for the essay part. I was not in my best days that time and have been regretting some wrong decisions I’ve made and feeling bad and hating myself for losing grasps on my dreams and letting it disappear in front of me. Ha! What if fate would like to throw a joke on me and make the essay question something like… “What is that one thing you’ve wanted to do but wasn’t able to? Why weren’t you able to do it?

Lo and behold THAT was the essay question! >.<

I’ve isolated myself from a lot of people then and was truly anxious entering the exam room because I know no one. I’ve heard some of my friends submitted an application but I’m not sure if they are coming. While looking for my seat, I saw Alli from Bluehanbok. I was so SO happy seeing her. As what she’ve mentioned, we haven’t seen each other for a long time. At least we’re able to catch up with each other even if it’s only the time in between the exam.

When the first part of the exam was given, I immediately checked the essay question before anything else so that I can think of what to write while going over the Vocabulary and the Writing part. I skipped items I was unsure of. Even if I was only torn between 2 answers, I skipped them. I said I’ll just go back later on and give my wildest guess if I still won’t be able to figure it out. I skipped one item after another. Then I started writing my essay. Apparently, I enjoyed writing the essay so much since it was something I was currently contemplating on. I was surprised with myself as well because as far as I can remember, it was a struggle for me composing my essay last time I took the exam but I was more comfortable writing this time. I wrote, wrote and wrote continously, sponteaneously. I finished writing my essay at the nick of time. I managed to finish the last sentence I wanted to write before the protors asked us to put our pens down.

Pens down.

F@ck!

I wasn’t able to go back to all the items I skipped earlier!

I knew right there and then, I won’t pass the exam.

Listening was pretty okay but as always I entrusted my answers to the good old eenie mynee moe for the last sets.

Reading was still a struggle. It was not as difficult as before but I still need time (loads of it) to be able to understand the longer paragraphs. And that’s something we didn’t have then – time. There’s was an interesting item though. Most of the items were either declaratives or narrations – news, stories, etc. But there was one item when it was more of conversational. It was a story but instead of being narrated, what the characters said were simply enclosed in quotation marks. And I was able to easily understand it. I realized then that my Korean is just still very conversational. Can carry conversations, yes. But reading long narratives and news, no.

The result – another  불합격!

But I was happy with my score even if my Writing score is quite embarrassing.

I’m happy with my Listening. I only got 41 last time and now it almost doubled. I’m also glad I got more than 50% for reading now. I could’ve gotten more than 50% for the Vocabulary section if I was only able to go back to all the items I skipped. For Writing, I don’t know. I know I suck in grammar usage still. I also really cannot answer the fill in the blanks part. It also seems like the Writing part was the most difficult for this exam. I have a number of friends who were really good but got a really low score as well for the Writing part.

32

Here’s my score during the 28th TOPIK held last 2012:429477_10151172385626818_731242903_nI’ve registered for the upcoming 34th TOPIK exam this coming April 20th and I’m pretty excited! I believe it will be the last exam following the old format. I’m aiming to get a Level 4, but I’d already be really happy if I can get a Level 3. :)

 

It’s About Time #womanofmydreams

I was getting ready to watch a tearjerker local drama online since I missed the live broadcast when an ad loaded. I usually can’t wait for the 5 second countdown to finish so that I can ‘Skip the Ad’, but my attention was caught by this commercial.

Exactly what I need to hear!

I’m not really giving these type of advice to friends. It’s actually ME who needs these advice because I often forget that I’m great the way I am, that I need to stop feeling bad about myself because there’s nothing wrong with me, that these ill feelings I’ve been burdening myself are just a waste of time and I should instead enjoy life!

Sometimes ads can also make sense.

My Korean Corner Turned 3!

birthday-cupcake

My Korean Corner turned 3 last January 18 without me realizing it. Well, afterall, I haven’t posted much this past year (unlike the first two years of this blog when I never missed a month without posting anything).

And it makes me sad. ㅠㅠ

I missed the days when I get to write regularly. Writing has been a good friend to me. It relaxes me. It calms me down when I get to write thoughts that are running wild inside my head. It comforts me when I get to jot down feelings that are brimming in my chest. However I’m prone to getting overwhelmed easily. When thoughts became too many and when emotions gets too strong, I can’t write. Ironically, just when I have so much to say, that’s when I can’t write a damn thing! It seems like thoughts, ideas, feelings were all rushing widly towards my fingertips and I can’t seem to determine what to write down, how exactly I should write them down and most of all, how to begin writing. I guess I have to learn how to organize my thoughts better.

I’ve also been busy. No. Scratch that. I was not REALLY busy. I didn’t enrol so I don’t have to go to school. I don’t have to attend classes. I have no readings, assignments, exams or papers. And even though I’m working full time, all I do is go to the office and work for 8, 9 hours 5 times a week. I still have lots of hours a day and 2 full days for myself. I just deliberately made myself busy because I was (and still am) running away from… I don’t know what exactly… reality perhaps?

Many things happened. No! Something happened that resulted to many many MANY other things.

In summary: I fell in love for the first time in my life and got my heart broken to million pieces instead. And it was too much for an amateur like me to handle.

I dreaded sitting down in front of my laptop because I know I’ll just end up thinking about someone I shouldn’t be thinking of anymore. So instead I went out with friends, I went out alone, I travelled, I went to the gym, I watched Korean, Japanese, English, Filipino dramas, movies, whatever I can grab online. I studied Korean. I want to be dead tired everyday so that when I hit my bed, I’d immediately fall asleep. I don’t need the luxury of free time because free time to me is time to overthink – and that’s the last thing I want to do. I did everything that doesn’t involve too much thinking. Things that doesn’t involve opening myself up – like writing.

The result – abandoned blog, thousands of unread emails (3,000+ as of writing this), hundreds of Facebook notifications and requests, outdated me!

I acknowledge that I’m still not okay. I wonder when will I be okay. But now I want to be okay. I may not be okay and I may not know when will I be okay but I’ll try my best to make myself okay from now on.

And I feel like writing once again just like how I used to write before. I’m glad finding myself writing this way again and I’m hoping I can sustain this. I missed blogging so much and I missed all my blogger friends. I also missed fangirling over Kim Sun Ah. I’ve been outdated about the blogs that I’ve been following, about Kim Sun Ah and about the latest Korean dramas. I guess it’s time to go back!

Despite minimal posts last year (that were dominated by heartbroken rants), cheers to My Korean Corner‘s 3rd year!